The Life of a Portrait, Nothing to Do but Watch
by PerplexingParadox
Summary: A portrait does her duty, and keeps incriminating knowledge to herself. But that doesn't mean that she can't see what others are blinded to. The Fat Lady has watched the Weasley Twins for many a year, and knows exactly what she sees. M in later chapters.
1. What a Portrait Sees, a Portrait Knows

(A/N): Okay, so here's a new story (this one will have an actual plot!)! It is told through the eyes of the Fat Lady portrait; and I have so named her as Plithia, because I could find no reference of what she is actually named. The story will be chapters of what Plithia witnesses of the Weasley twins and their interactions. Some events will be cannon, others will be of my own invention. If you want to suggest any scenes that you'd like to see, you can do so via PM or review! This chapter will just be an introduction (no actual scenes), and updates will be erratic!

Summary: A portrait does her duty, and keeps incriminating knowledge to herself. But that doesn't mean that she can't see what others are blinded to. The Fat Lady has watched the Weasley Twins for many a year, and knows exactly what she sees.

POV: The Fat Lady, hence named Plithia.

Warnings: This story is rated M (and for _very_ good reason). In later chapters, there will be explicit M/M relations, and, more specifically, Twincest! If you don't like, or if you are at an age where you really _shouldn't_ be reading this, there is a beautiful little back button, located in the top left corner of your screen! I honestly don't believe anyone under 17 shouldn't read this (as so many do), seeing as I am underage, myself, but I think that's the _legal_ warning, so I have to say it.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or setting; I owe all knowledge of that to my Queen Rowling. I do, however, own the name of the Fat Lady, and the basic plot line.

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><p>Plithia had watched them for many years, and knew exactly what was going on. Not one to be fooled by the appearances of any, she kept an eye out for any funny business, and was a bit surprised - though not at all angered - to see a unique dynamic between two red-headed twins.<p>

Occasionally accompanied by the other boy - Lee, she told herself - the twins were completely inseparable. They were a packaged deal; good luck separating them. If you saw one, you saw the other; no 'if's, 'and's or 'but's to it.

Traipsing through the portrait hole at all imaginable hours of the day and night - not that it was her duty or her place to report their comings and goings - the boys paid her no heed. They would mutter the password without glancing once at her, for they were too immersed in their own conversation - immersed in each other, she mused.

There was a constant sparkle in their eyes as they looked upon each other, only dampened when their twin was absent - an occurrence so rare, Plithia could count the instances on one hand.

They moved like magnets, pulling each other through the portrait hole, closer to their twin. They were almost one person; just a single entity with an endless knowledge of every aspect of itself.

They rarely looked away from each other, and that was only to tell people off for interrupting. They spoke of joke shops and secret passageways, of pranks and midnight wanderings. They always focused on what _they_ would be doing. The words 'me', 'myself', and 'I' did not exist, unless closely following the name of their twin.

She would never tell anyone else of what she'd noticed, though - oh no, a portrait does her duty, and keeps her mouth shut. To be honest, Plithia had always had a soft spot for the troublemaking duo, and she would never put them in harm's way by suggesting their bond to others.

Plithia had watched them for many years, and she knew of the love they shared.

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><p>(AN): Have I sparked your interest? If so, click that fancy little 'Follow Story' or 'Follow Author' button, so that you'll know when I update! If you want me to write faster, then you should also press that cute little 'Review' button, too!

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	2. A Curiously Accurate First Impression

(A/N): Okay, here's chapter two! It was really late, and I had nothing to do, and I kinda got a little bit of inspiration... so this was born! It's not wonderful, and I'm not sure if I'm happy with it, but at least it's another chapter for you guys! I promise, the next one WILL be longer. I just have to think of a good scene to do. Any suggestions? Read, review, ENJOY! =D

Words: 610

Summary: A portrait does her duty, and keeps incriminating knowledge to herself. But that doesn't mean that she can't see what others are blinded to. The Fat Lady has watched the Weasley Twins for many a year, and knows exactly what she sees.

POV: The Fat Lady, hence named Plithia.

Warnings: This story is rated M (and for _very_ good reason). In later chapters, there will be explicit M/M relations, and, more specifically, Twincest! If you don't like, or if you are at an age where you really _shouldn't_ be reading this, there is a beautiful little back button, located in the top left corner of your screen! I honestly don't care how old you are (I'm underage), but I think that's the _legal_ warning, so... there you go.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or setting; I owe all knowledge of that to my Queen Rowling. I do, however, own the name of the Fat Lady, and the basic plot line.

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><p>Plithia finally let the horridly false smile slip from her face as the last of the Gryffindors slipped into the Common Room. It was the same every year; every group of students (even if the groups arrived mere seconds apart) felt the need to try out the password for themselves. The worst were the First Years; some had never even seen talking pictures before tonight.<p>

They had been chattering on and on incessantly for the past two hours, and it was now about midnight. There were no more students to be seen, and Plithia was just about to slip off into the blissful oblivion of sleep. That is, until she heard the telltale pitter-patter of first year feet.

"Shhh, George! Your giant feet have got to make the loudest noise humanly possible!" A small voice whispered carryingly and warningly.

"Sorry, mate. Just a bit excited, eh?" A nearly identical voice mirror back, louder than the first. If Plithia hadn't been so on her toes from it being the first night, she'd have thought it to be one person speaking with themself.

"Yeah, I reckon it's got to be a record! We've got every single house password!" One voice said enthusiastically, but more quietly, so Plithia figured it to be the first.

"Yeah, except for Ravenclaw. Smart asses. Anyone could figure out a bloody riddle!" The second (and now remarkably louder) voice snorted.

At that point, two short, redheaded males came down the corridor into view, each carrying a load of food. Plithia could only gape at the two small boys – they must have been first years, for she'd yet to lay eyes on them – as they approached her portrait slowly.

"Yeah, I suppose we could sleep in any dormitory we wanted. Any suggestions?" The quieter one asked, humor prevalent in his tone.

"I don't know, Fred; the Gyffindor dorms are looking like a wonderful option, considering that next to no walking is necessary," The louder one reasoned.

At that, the short twins looked up at Plithia, their eyes gleaming identically as they took in the grandeur of the painting.

"Caput Draconis," The one that must have been Fred said surely, looking back to his brother for approval.

Plithia did not move. She merely looked at the strange boys with all-seeing eyes.

"Where did you come across that food?" She asked suddenly, eyeing the bounty in the identical pairs of arms.

"Kitchen," They both answered simply.

She stared at them, still not comprehending.

She'd heard tell of some Seventh Years (and even the occasional Sixth Year) that had found their way into the hidden kitchen, but _these two_? They were most certainly first years! Even more remarkably, they'd already wheedled the current passwords of every house out of who-knows-where.

"Er, George?" Fred murmured lowly, eyeing his twin warily. "What's wrong with her?"

"Uh…" George looked at Fred, then turned back to Plithia. "Caput Draconis," He said, emphasizing the words more.

That shook Plithia from her daze, and she looked down at the two critically once more. She swung forward, gazing at them as long as she could.

Before they disappeared from her view, she watched as Fred clasped onto George's hand (despite the loads they still carried in their arms), pulling him through the portrait hole.

Long after they'd entered the common room, Plithia sat awake, pondering what she'd just witnessed. She analyzed everything from the already-prominent rule breaking streak, to the firm grasp of their hands. Eventually she shrugged, letting her lids fall shut.

She would simply have to keep an eye on these two.

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><p>(AN): Aaaaand, you've read chapter two. Sorry that it couldn't be longer. These might just end up being all drabble-y, unless I get some inspiration. Wanna suggest a scene that you want to see? Do it! PM me or review with the idea! Anyway, hope you liked it. If you wanna see more, click that little 'Follow Story' or 'Follow Author' button! And, if you liked it, that pretty 'Review' button has always been a favorite of mine!

Bear in mind, while constructive criticism is appriciated, all flames will be used to roast marshmellows! =D

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